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Wonder In Grief

While taking product photos today, I had a sentimental moment...one of my prop pieces is a ribcagejar my baby brother made in a high school ceramics class. I it, and think of my brother every time see it. Its been 11 years since a childhood cancer took his life...and, I admit, the majority of my thoughts of him are happy, WONDERFUL memories.

 

Its rare now to feel the pangs of anguish I felt for the first few years after his death...do you know that feeling? The stabbing pain in the  stomach that makes it hard to breathe - the grief? Id never felt it before, not even when my beloved grandparents transitioned. I thought the feeling would never go away, that I would carry it forever. I wondered how I would manage to be a good mom, or massage therapist, or a functioning human....I wondered how I would be able to do anything with that heaviness weighing me down. Was it just time that helped? I dont know, I dont think so. I think it was a combination of medication, therapy, a more supportive husband, and my new habit of telling my children the funniest and most positive stories about my brother that I can remember.... Letting them get to know their uncle for all the awesomeness he was, instead of dwelling on all the things that would never be.

 

I keep his memory alive, and real, and my grief HAS become wonder and gratitude for having had such an amazing person in my life for his short season.

 

What are ways youve been able to deal with grief? Do you hold onto objects that belonged to your loved one that has passed? How do you keep their memory alive? What do you think of Grief Journaling? 

 

Id love your comments below.

~Amanda 


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